Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Do I have what it takes to climb the tower?

I'm used to having bizarre dreams - I have an overactive imagination, and it gets worse when I haven't written in a while (the Beast doesn't like being ignored), though this is hardly the case as of late.

But last night, my insecurities were the star of the show. The setting was one I'm familiar with somewhat: a busy town square, nearing dusk, shoppers and pedestrians milling about. I don't know what it is about this scene that it keep reappearing in my dreams. The more that I tried to concentrate on the people around me, the more of them that turned into people on my Twitter.

NOTE: A very strong indication that I've spent too much time there recently, especially if it is now invading my dreams. Another vice, crutch, addiction - whatever you call it - will have to go.

Anyways, I digress. The Twitter people weren't what caught me off guard. Real people always show up in my dreams, whether they make sense or not.

In this dream, there were towers on the edges of the squares. Your typical dark, foreboding medieval towers, complete with turrets and moss growing up the sides. In one of these towers (it was one on the right, not sure if that can be interpreted as something), a writer was confined in order to complete The Great Novel. This writer I'm familiar with and have spoken to on Twitter, but why this particular writer, I'm not sure. Maybe all the exposure I've had to his work lately?

Time is always off when it comes to dream scape, naturally. They are just movies made from memories playing in our heads after all. But I could swear said writer was only up there for 5 minutes before being released. When I inquired how the progress was coming, he just flipped his gorgeous hair away from his face. "All done. I'm working on another project now." As if it was the easiest thing to do in the world, while I was left standing there gaping, my resolve to keep writing kind of teetering.

Now I'm not as naive as some would have you believe. I understand that there is no such thing as The Great Novel. I also understand that writing a novel, any novel requires effort and skill. I'm not trying to write The Great Novel. At this time in my life, I am and will be perfectly happy just to finish the rough draft I'm working on now. If I can get the final copy completed before New Years, that will be one hell of a success for me. Who gives a crap if it gets published? The fact that I'm writing again after so many years and my former muse Tyrone running off with that damn homeless man.....

I can only hope that since I recognize this as my subconscious being a bastard and trying to deter me from what I want to do - answer the call, give in to the drive, feed my desire to write - I can ward off the self destruction. I refuse to let one irrational dream stop that. It may not be good, but its something.

So I wrote this silly little post just to write, and have added about 50 more blogs/articles on writing to my reading cue. Here's to finishing the rough draft!
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Monday, April 27, 2009

The Book Stockpile of 2009

Because we all know the apocalypse is coming, in one fashion or another, and I want to be prepared with something to spend my days until I either a.) waste away from radiation; b.) get eaten by a zombie/abducted by aliens, etc or c.) die of old age. And so the book stockpile came to be.

Between audiobooks, e-books and dead-tree books, the stockpile should at least take me into 2010 without be going mad, and I'm always adding to it.

So what is in the stockpile so far, you ask?

Audiobooks:
Ancestor by Scott Sigler
Antithesis by J. Daniel Sawyer
Eden by Phil Rossi
Erotica a la carte by Philippa Ballantine
Fried Green Zombies by John Allen
Gearheart by Alex White
Jack Wakes Up by Seth Harwood
Weather Child by Philippa Ballantine

Kindle E-Books:
Assassin's Apprentice by Robin Hobb
Blood Engines by T.A. Pratt
The Bounty by Beth Williamson
Bridge of the Serpent God by John Peter Drummond
Catastrophe's Spell by Mayer Alan Brenner
Codex Alera: Furies of Calderon by Jim Butcher
Codex Alera: Academ's Fury by Jim Butcher
Codex Alera: Cursor's Fury by Jim Butcher
Concrete Jungle by Charles Stross
Crime Scene at Cardwell Ranch by B.J. Daniels
Dark Becoming by Marcus Mebes
Fire-Tongue by Sax Rohmer
Geek Mafia by Rick Dakan
Geek Mafia: Mile Zero by Rick Dakan
Halo by Tom Maddox
His Majesty's Dragon by Naomi Novik
(Finished the entire Temeraire series a week ago and LOVED it!)
The Infinite Sea by Jeffrey Carver
Kiss Me Deadly by Michele Hauf
Neptune Crossing by Jeffrey Carver
Trail of Space Pirates by Carey Rockwell
Spell of Intrigue by Mayer Alan Brenner
Star Dragon by Mike Brotherton
Strange Attractors by Jeffrey Carver
Sunborn by Jeffrey Carver

Dead-Tree Books:
The Road by Cormac
Characters, Emotion & Viewpoint by Nancy Kress
Common Sense by Glenn Beck

To Be Added:
Tim Dorsey
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Thursday, April 23, 2009

Review: Crescent by Phil Rossi

Crescent by Phil Rossi
Genre: SciFi Horror
Available at Podiobooks.com
Features the band Chrysalis


Note, the blah blah disclaimer: It is recommended for mature audiences and not appropriate for minors, so keep the little ones away.

This morning I finished listening to Crescent by Phil Rossi. Crescent is a blend of science fiction and horror, and Rossi does it well. It has the feel of Stephen King and little Lovecraft, with sex, violence and terrifying things waiting for you in the dark. His twists keep you on your feet and have you gripping the edge of your seat, begging for more.

Its a great plot, and I thoroughly enjoyed the tale he's spun here. Its dark without being cheesy or overdone. You really get the feel of the characters, finding yourself immersed in the conflicts surrounding them. Their struggles, desires, and acomplishments become real, which makes their fear all the more palpable.

And there is plenty to fear on Crescent. I hope you're not afraid of the dark.
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The quiet after the storm

Things are quiet this morning. Other than telephones and various radios playing, its almost peaceful. Our co-worker is back, and so far the truce called first thing this morning is still in effect. My love and I had a late night with a friend that was visiting, and I'm just too tired to duke it out today, not to mention I don't want to stress out another co-worker who had to come back from medical leave early and is not doing too well. There's no reason to make matters worse with re-hashing points that have been proven time and time again.

I had debated on taking tomorrow off, just for a much needed break from the place, but instead I've convinced the latter co-worker to go back on leave while she can, and am stepping up to the plate to take one for the team. Besides, I'm leaving for an entire week in July and they'll have to make it on their own without me. I'll cut them some slack.
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Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Shit Storms and Burning Bridges

Well.

This day could be going a lot better. Like I could of just left my ass in bed, where it was warm, safe and no stress. A co-worker, one pretty high on the ladder despite her refusal to believe so, up and quit. Just like that. Didn't handle her responsiblities for the day, things that effect everyone at the company (like our paychecks); didn't leave proper procedures on how things needed to be handled, no two week notice, nothing. Just grabbed her things, told the Big Honcho she'll get her stuff later, and was out the door, leaving the rest of us shocked, confused and with a elephant-sized load of shit to shovel.

Wonderful, I say! Just beautiful. Why the hell can't I do that?

We are a small company. Our office staff was already at the bare minimum, but now we going to have to scrap by. I am one of those office staff. Because of this co-worker leaving, I am now handling twice my usual workload, with none of the benefits, or relief of it in sight. How is this fair? I'm the only one here able to shoulder some of those the responsiblities; all the IT and technical crap I sadly have no clue about, its all Greek to me. The rest of my week will be spent on a scavenger hunt for files and paperwork, since all my calls and emails to the co-worker have proved to be unproductive, unless you count my sky rocketing blood pressure. What is bothering me the most, is the fact that I'm being treated like the enemy. Is she upset that I didn't stand by her and walk out as well? I did my part, I defended her decision, but there is only so much I'm willing to do when she insists on burning the bridges leading to me. Not to mention, I have a family to support and a mortgage.

I could really use some comfort food, or anything covered in chocolate. I'm serious, I don't care what you cover, as long as its covered with rich, creamy milk or dark chocolate. I'll rant about the Atkins Diet some other time, though.
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Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Round 'Em Up!

Tonight we took our five year old to her Kindergarten Roundup at the same Elementary school her brother attends. I'm still amazed that she's old enough to be attending kindergarten already - somedays it seems like just yesterday she was still nursing and learning to walk. It makes me sad to see her grow up so fast, but she's beautiful and intelligent, and always brings joy into my life even on the darkest days. I'm nervous, as a first time mother always is, but its a really good school, and I have faith in their abilities to educate my child.
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Blah-og

I'd like to get around to changing the blog layout, but I'm unhappy with most of the templates here, not to mention I have no time. All my free time lately has been wrapped up in Synnove.

Edit: I like the colors now, but the layout leaves much to be desired. Meh.
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Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Conficker, Rain and Writing

If anyone is interested in it: A test to check for the Conficker Virus. My mother is in IT and kindly keeps me up to date in the latest threats to PCs, so I can ignore them.

And outside its beautiful today. No, the sun is not shining, but the rain is one of the best features of Florida. It washes away all the Ben-gay and sun tan lotion so we can start anew tomorrow. Inhale the freshness!

Today, my writing books have finally shipped. My trip to Barnes & Nobel Saturday night was a bust - spent close to an hour scanning their shelves and not finding a single book I needed (or even one that I wanted), when I could have been listening to Prime Time Geek , washing dishes or more importantly, writing as I had planned. The night left me frustrated and unfulfilled, but now the clouds of despair are lifting and there are pretty flowers and oh look at the cute wittle bunnies....

Ahem. So yes, tonight I'll write, finish the chapter. Its a rough - very rough - draft. I'm not surprised that I'm so rusty after not writing anything of particular interest in quite a while. I can only hope it's like riding a bike (I expect to fall down many times.)

EDIT: Books are in route, according to UPS and will be here on Thursday.
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Monday, April 13, 2009

Growing older, more or less

Morning, freaks.

Again, the morning has come too soon. I've found it harder to recover from late nights, especially multiple, unproductive, late nights in a row. A sign of getting older, I'm sure, but I'm only 27 and its too early in my life for my body to start betray me.

Right? Ugh.

Getting up in the morning, I'm achy from the lack of sleep. The body is sluggish, the eyes open just enough to let the bare minimun of light in, the bad knee groaning in protest. To state that I'm not a morning person, is to say Stonehenge is 'just a bunch of rocks.' If my dreams had been plagued with nightmares (as they are more often than not), then it doesn't take long for me to morph into Mental Breakdown Barbie - without the size zero waist.

Two hours and countless cups of coffee later, I'm back to my usual saturnine self. Give me the nights, keep your days. Time is going by too quickly for my taste - there is so much left to do!
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Friday, April 10, 2009

Dungeons & Dragons co-creator dies at 61

Oh.

I'm so very sad now. And so soon after the death of Gary Gygax.

Rest in Peace, Dave Arneson.

May your legacy live on throughout the ages.
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One down, so many to go

I had a good night - didn't go to bed until sometime before 2am, but the fatigue is offset by the fact that I completed the first chapter last night. Hurray! I'm content with how it came out, not saying that I won't completely restructure it during editing, but it was enough to work with. It was a hard chapter to write, not only because it was the first, but because of the story line itself. It is an emotional beginning.

But now, oh yes now I can delve into the heart of it. Tell the story I came to tell in the first place.
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The 'All Clear'

Why do you look so frightened?

Shhh, its alright. I hit her with enough tranquilizers to take down a herd of elephants.

What? Oh no no, she'll be fine.

Yes, I realize she's going to be pissed off when she wakes up. We're safe for a while, though.

No, I don't think chaining her to a box inside of another box is a bit excessive.
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Thursday, April 9, 2009

Heed the warnings

It's not safe around me today. I've done what I can to warn those near me, but my pleas fall on deaf ears. Fools, you don't know what you are up against.

The Beast is raging, thrashing against the bonds that I've erected, but they won't hold for long. Hell, to be honest, I'm tempted by my love for chaos just to let her free and feed. But blood, guts and the smell of terror is just so hard to get out of the furniture, and I'm tired enough as it is.

I'm also sad to report that due to the Beast last night, I didn't get a single word written, which only infuriated the Beast even more. Today is going to be a struggle if I can't find a way to appease her or keep her under control.
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Sunday, April 5, 2009

WIP

My current work in progress finally has a name - Synnove.

Synnove will have its own blog, connected to this one, when I'm ready to go live with it. It shouldn't be much longer until I'm done with the first couple of chapters.
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Friday, April 3, 2009

It could of turned out badly...

After a week now of having a shattered glasstop, we have a new range!

The new one is beautiful and shiny! We can cook things in a skillet again instead of on the grill outside! But getting it delivered could of turned out horribly wrong.

My wonderful father in law brought it to our house for us yesterday while we were both at work. It was very unexpected, and I am grateful for the effort it took. Having to stare at the remains of what was once the centerpiece of the kitchen was depressing. When he arrived at our humble residence thou, he realized the key he assumed was to our front door, was not in fact the key to our front door. I'm not sure what transpired between this thought and the next, but apparently he checked all the windows. Finding our daughter's window unlocked (something I will make sure never happens again), he preceeded to open it and climb inside.

This was mid day, perhaps afternoon. We don't have a lot of neighbors (foreclosures popping up to the left and right of us), but the ones we do have we talk to, our children play together, friendly greetings all around. Were they all gone at that time? Perhaps.

No one found it suspicious that a man was climbing through the window in front of the house, in open view to everyone in our neighborhood, and from there opening to door to the garage. With a moving truck in the drive way. Granted, he was putting things inside the garage instead of wiping us out, but a part of me is alarmed at how easy it could of been for a complete stranger to violate the sanctity of our home. Since our dog passed away a few weeks ago, the feelings of security haven't been the same.

I don't believe there would of been trouble if someone had reported the suspicious activity as my father in law had every right to be there. At the same time, I would of felt better knowing that our home is safe when we are away.

A few more months, and we'll be able to get a new puppy, and with it, peace of mind.
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